Posted via email from Ben Lucier’s posterous

Posted via email from Ben Lucier’s posterous

We’ve torn off the old shingles and re-shingled most of one side. Should be done in the next hour and a half. But only if I put down the iPhone and get to work. Woot!

See and download the full gallery on posterous

Posted via email from Ben Lucier’s posterous

We don’t have a lot of room in out bathroom, which is on the other side of our spare bedroom.

I’m building a shelving unit in the bathroom that will take about 10 inches away from the bedroom. We’re going to also build a wall unit for a TV and all of our entertainment devices.

The problem (at the moment) is that I seem to have a natural gas pipe, electrical, hot and cold pipes as well as a drain that need to be re- routed.

I can do everything except the gas… I’ll leave that to a pro.

See and download the full gallery on posterous

Posted via email from Ben Lucier’s posterous

Toronto Star article reported:

• A suspicious four-alarm fire at Best Choice Auto Sales (2377 Danforth Ave at Westlake) that forced the evacuation of about 100 residents in a nearby apartment  building.
• Police officers evacuated the residents due to concerns the shop had hazardous chemicals and rubber tires on the site. They were allowed to return to their homes around 7 a.m. No injuries were reported.
• Most of the fire had been extinguished just before 8 a.m., but firefighters remained on site, battling hot spots inside the building. About 40 fire vehicles were called to the scene, accompanied by about 80 firefighters.

I visited the site with my camera gear around 7pm yesterday and was just in time to catch the start of the demolition. The photos are included below and clicking a thumbnail will open a larger version.

We have three cats at our house:

1. A fat orange bastard named Chester who hates everyone and would sooner smack you in the face with his claws than say good morning. Fortunately, Chester is old and won’t be around much longer. I know it sounds bad, but I mean that in the nicest way. Mostly.
2. A lazy calico female named Cleo. Cleo sleeps all day. She’s kind of cute-- when she’s not dropping 2 tonnes of white, brown and black fur all over the freakin’ house.
3. A beautiful but skittish seal point tipped Siamese named Simon. Simon was rescued from our parking lot while we were living in a small apartment at Danforth and Pape. He’s my favourite, but he’s got some habits that we’re not too happy about… that’s why Simon takes anti-depressants every day. Sigh.

So when I saw the Simon’s Cat “Fly Guy” video on YouTube, a lot of the video hit really close to home. So much so that I had to share it with you here. If you’re a cat owner, you’ll understand. If you’re not… well… I get that too. I’m a dog person inside, but I tolerate the cats because of the women in my life. Enjoy!

A humorous story as recounted by Fred:

Last weekend I saw something at Larry’s Pistol & Pawn Shop that sparked my interest. The occasion was our 15th anniversary and I was looking for a little something extra for my wife Julie. What I found was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse- sized Taser. The effects of the Taser were supposed to be short lived, with no long-term adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate time to retreat to safety.

WAY TOO COOL!

Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home. I loaded two AAA batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button. Nothing! I was disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button and pressed it against a metal surface at the same time; I’d get the blue arc of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs.

AWESOME!!!

Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Julie what that burn spot is on the face of her microwave.

Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it couldn’t be all that bad with only two triple-A batteries, right? There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently (trusting little soul) while I was reading the directions and thinking that I really needed to try this thing out on a flesh & blood moving target. I must admit I thought about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a second) and thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat. But, if I was going to give this thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as advertised.. Am I wrong?

So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading glasses perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand, and Taser in another. The directions said that a one-second burst would shock and disorient your assailant; a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a major loss of bodily control; a three-second burst would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water. Any burst longer than three seconds would be wasting the batteries.

All the while I’m looking at this little device measuring about 5″ long, less than 3/4 inch in circumference; pretty cute really and (loaded with two itsy-bitsy triple-A batteries) thinking to myself, ‘no possible way!’

What happened next is almost beyond description, but I’ll do my best:

I’m sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head cocked to one side as to say, ‘don’t do it dip-shit,’ reasoning that a one second burst from such a tiny little ole thing couldn’t hurt all that bad. I decided to give myself a one second burst just for heck of it. I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and –

HOLY MOTHER OF GOD . . WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION . . . WHAT THE HELL!!!

I’m pretty sure Jessie Ventura ran in through the side door, picked me up in the recliner, then body slammed us both on the carpet, over and over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body in the oddest position, and tingling in my legs. The cat was making meowing sounds I had never heard before, clinging to a picture frame hanging above the fireplace, obviously in an attempt to avoid getting slammed by my body flopping all over the living room.

Note: If you ever feel compelled to ‘mug’ yourself with a tazer, one note of caution: there is no such thing as a one second burst when you zap yourself! You will not let go of that thing until it is dislodged from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor.. A three second burst would be considered conservative!

IT HURT LIKE HELL!!!

A minute or so later (I can’t be sure, as time was a relative thing at that point), I collected my wits (what little I had left), sat up and surveyed the landscape. My bent reading glasses were on the mantel of the fireplace. The recliner was upside down and about 8 feet or so from where it originally was. My triceps, right thigh and both nipples were still twitching. My face felt like it had been shot up with Novocain, and my bottom lip weighed 88 lbs. I had no control over the drooling.

Apparently I pooped on myself, but was too numb to know for sure and my sense of smell was gone. I saw a faint smoke cloud above my head which I believe came from my hair. I’m still looking for my testicles and I’m offering a significant reward for their safe return!

P.S…. My wife, can’t stop laughing about my experience, loved the gift, and now regularly threatens me with it!

–Fred

[Editor's Note: We did our best to locate the original source of this story (and Fred) so that we could properly attribute this story. If you are the copyright holder, or have more information, please let us know.]

At dinner this evening, I was telling Heather that as a child, I would see a hockey fight break-out on the television and think the players were complete idiots.

If I was about to get my butt kicked around the ice from a player on the opposing team, you can bet the last thing I would do is throw away such a perfectly crafted weapon.

As adults we know what the rules are, but as an 8 year old Chuck Norris fan, I had a hard time believing that people would willingly put down their hockey sticks and throw down the gloves so they could punch each other as hard as they can in the face.

And another thing… if you leave your gloves on, it won’t hurt so much when you punch a guy’s helmet either, you knuckleheads.

(Flickr Photo courtesy of hroyer.com)

During a trip to the local Home Depot this past Saturday to replace some deadbolt locks at my house, I was intrigued by the product you see on the right: The Weiser Lock SmartScan, a deadbolt that uses your fingerprint for entry.

From the Weiser website:

SmartScan utilizes biometrics to scan the subdermal part of your finger (more precise than a fingerprint scan) to unlock your deadbolt, eliminating the need for keys.

My excitement of solving a problem with technology soon waned after realizing Weiser has manufactured a seriously flawed product. Fuel was added to the fire when I purchased several previously owned products being sold as new by Home Depot.

After installing and using the Weiser SmartScan product for more than a week, I have lots to say about it:

1. Loose ribbon cable fitting, preventing the sensor from making secure contact with the circuit board. I resolved this problem by cutting stiff plastic and fitting it into the ribbon cable connector.
2. Fragile ribbon cable. Many do it yourselfers are not careful when performing their weekend projects. In 3 of the packages, I found the ribbon cable had been pinched, sliced, or both. This probaby happened during the fitting to the door.
3. Very stiff deadbolt turn. This makes the 4 AA batteries drain faster and the motor work harder than necessary to close and open the door.

Home Depot’s returns process is severely flawed as they’re putting failed, previously owned and configured devices back on their shelves for unsuspecting customers to re-purchase. The many SmartScan locks I purchased had been used by somebody else. There were missing keys inside, unprotected/unwrapped parts rolling around and scratches marring the product.

I made 6 visits to 4 different Toronto Home Depots, traveling a total of 67KM (nearly two hours of drive time alone). I went through 7 Weiser SmartScan deadbolts. Of the 7 locks, at least 4 were previously owned and 6 were non-functioning out of the box. I began the project at 12PM, and completed at 7PM later than evening, an investment of 7 hours… a full working day?

To keep my facts straight, I put together a chart of of my visits that also takes into account the kilometres I drove and the time I spent going from various Home Depot locations trying to solve my problem:

Visit #1: Home Depot (Curity Store)

• Purchased SmartScan #1
• After installation and much troubleshooting “sensor error timeout messages, I realize the ribbon cable connecting the fingerprint scanner to the circuit board was sliced

Visit #2: Home Depot (Curity Store)

• Back to Home Depot to return Smartscan #1.
• Purchase Smartscan #2.
• Noticed something odd and after opening the box, I could see why: unwrapped parts were rolling around, probably because it was returned from a previous customer and Home Depot staff just through it back on the shelf.
• I installed the lock anyway, but couldn’t get it to work because the admin user was already setup by the previous lock owner. The system requires an admin fingerprint to operate.
• Assuming there’s a way to reset the admin fingerprint, I called Weiser, but they’re closed on weekends. Their website also did not have any information on how to reset the device.
• I was going to keep the lock for the weekend (using the keys as backup), but the previous owner of the of the lock didn’t put the keys in the box, leaving me with no way to lock my front door.
• Knowing that Home Depot’s Curity store was out of Satin Nickel SmartScans, I decided to head to their Wicksteed location to exchange the product.

Visit #3: Home Depot (Wicksteed Store)

• I explained situation to a young woman at the returns counter. She apologized and asked me to get another one from the shelves.
• After grabbing SmartScan #3 from the shelf, I headed home.
• Smartscan #3 was also previously owned and locked with the admin fingerprint of the previous owner. Kicking myself for not testing the lock at the store before I left, I grabbed my 4 AA batteries and headed back to the Wicksteed location.

Visit #4: Home Depot (Wicksteed Store)

• Once again, I explained configuration problem to the young man behind the counter and he said he recognized me from before. He said to grab a new one and offered to speak with his manager to give me a discount. I told him that wasn’t necessary and I just wanted a product that worked.
• He told me to grab another product from the shelf, which I did (SmartScan #4).
• I told the clerk I’d like to test it before I left the store and he obliged. After opening the box however, I noticed it wasn’t Satin Nickel, but Polished Brass. I didn’t bother testing it.
• Having no more Satin Nickel product, I decided to head to the next Home Depot (in Scarborough).

Visit #5: Home Depot (Ellesmere Store)

• This location had one Satin Nickel deadbolt lock (Smartscan #5).
• Batteries in hand, I opened the packaging. Loose parts everywhere. Product was scratched all over. This is a $200 product?? I connected my batteries and confirmed my suspicion: The lock had also been configured and returned by a previous Home Depot customer.
• Having no more Satin Nickel, and running low on patience, I took a Venetian Bronze lock (Smartscan #6) to the customer service desk and asked for the store manager.
• I summarized the events of my day to Lisa and showed her the condition of Smartscan #5, a product I had pulled from their shelves 5 minutes earlier that they were selling as new.
• I then offered to show Lisa and her hardware manager Sallal how the deadbolts work. After opening Smartscan #6 and connecting my batteries, the product failed. Again, the ribbon cable connector was too loose to fit in the circuit board. I did find that if I squeezed the connector with index finger and thumb, sensor would be recognized, but I doubt an average Home Depot customer would figure that out.
• With no Satin Nickel product available, I asked for a refund on the product. My last stop of the day would be Home Depot at Gerrard Square.

Visit #6: Home Depot (Gerrard Square)

• After spending more than 6.5 hours on this project and almost 2 hours of driving around Toronto, I found a brand new Satin Nickel (SmartScan #7) lock fresh in box at the Gerrard Square Home Depot.
• With a hardware staff member on hand, I opened the box, connected my batteries and tested the device.
• Sensor timeout error. This SmartScan also suffers from a loose connector problem, causing the sensor to timeout. I told the staff member I was going to buy it anyway and see if I could fix it. I had modified my door to accept the product and it would look silly if I used something else.
• Home Depot Staff member advised against buying the product, telling me that “everybody brings these back to the store.”
• I thanked her for the advice, but purchased the device anyway, confident that i could “pad” the connector to get a better, more secure fit.

Summary

I was able to eventually get the SmartScan product to work. It’s not perfect and I’m not sure if I’ll keep it installed.

When you consider the trouble I’ve experienced and the $209 price point, it’s unacceptable that Home Depot continues to carry this product, especially given the feedback I was given by Home Depot staff themselves. Add to that the reckless return process, evident at each store I visited has me considering taking my business to another store altogether.

As for Weiser, how can you not know about this problem? What are you doing about it? The loose ribbon cable is a serious manufacturing defect that, based on my findings affects at least 30% of your product. Is it such a small percentage of your business that you can afford to anger consumers with such a poorly manufactured product?

Update: 1/SEP/2008: E-mailed response from Sara Molinari:

I’m very sorry to read about your experience. You should never have been misled about the new v used status of the product you bought – so I need to check with some people on why the vendor would have placed product in such a condition in our stores.

I will speak to someone in Toronto tomorrow to get more details.

Again, I apologize and am eager to get clarification on what happened here.

Sarah Molinari
Corporate Communications Manager
The Home Depot
office (770) 384-XXXX

It may not happen often, but every once in a while, I decide to try something new when it comes to food (ok, not just food).  Heather jokes that I’m a creature of habit and as I get older I think she may be right.  But I like what I like, you know?  If something works, why change it or do something different, especially when it comes to food?

I took a break from my work this afternoon and went for a stroll to our neighbourhood Sobeys.  On my shopping list: bread, tuna, red peppers, cucumber, sardines and avocado… I guess that part isn’t really relevant to the story, except for the part where I needed tuna and therefore ended up in the canned tuna aisle.

While looking over my options, the very tasty looking package caught my eye: Clover Leaf’s new (nouveau!) Yellowfin Tuna Steak.  The packaging folks did a great job, it looks darn good don’t you agree?  I love Tuna Steak, it’s one of my favourite dishes at Big Daddy’s (a local Toronto restaurant, specializing in Cajun cuisine).

Unfortunately for the adventurer in me, the fine folks at Clover Leaf reinforced my unconscious brain’s reasons for NOT trying new things.  The “tuna steak” was nothing more than a thin slice of tuna drenched in the mess you see here (click for a larger image if you dare):

Compare the packaging below with my real life photo above… is there any resemblance?  I don’t think so.  How can this type of product misrepresentation even be legal in this country?  I opened the package and as it instructed: “slide contents onto microwaveable plate” a torrent of oily juices exploded onto my plate and all over the counter.  What a mess!

Presentation aside, it was near impossible to eat.  Have you ever opened a can of tuna and tried eating it plain?  It’s really dry, right?  Imagine that, but lemon flavoured.  In its essence, that’s all this product is: an overpriced can of tuna, formed into a “steak” and stuck in a bag.  The April 2009 expiry date should have been a clue.  But I trusted Clover Leaf to produce a quality product.

It was so dry I had to keep chasing each bite with a healthy gulp of water to avoid that “pill stuck in your throat” feeling.

The worst part?  If you look at the Clover Leaf website, this garbage they’re passing off as food claimed top prize for the 2007 Canadian Grand Prix New Product Award!

What does that say about other products in the category?  Does the Grand Prix worry about how this reflects on their own brand?  I refuse to believe that my standards are so high.

Clover Leaf, if you’re listening, consider this a $2.99 win for your product marketing and packaging team, at the expense of a loyal customer.  I will never buy your products again and I will make it my personal mission to alert everybody I know about your lack of concern when it comes to producing a quality product.